December 31, 2009

.not the cheeriest end-of-year post.

its the last day of 2009 - and as predicted, 2009 was a surprise.

i met love.

despite that, never would i have imagined my year ending this way. two paths. one - a happy dead end. other - another round of scraping myself off the ground.

someone said to listen to myself. do what i want to do, so there would be less room for regret. but what if, what i want to do will clearly lead to a dead end? for what i'm fighting for holds nothing more than short-term emotional satisfaction? ...and inevitable future misery?

***

sometimes i wish "being realistic" is the silly option. after all, its love that we're dealing with. sometimes... i wish heartbreaks are like... stomach aches. take a pill and its gone. sometimes i wish i could close my eyes and find myself exactly where i know i should be... no where else than in those arms i've grown accustomed to.

i know my dreams are fading; and will someday be lived by someone else. and all i can do is hope that one day, that thought will stop tearing my soul apart. after all... so i heard... "sometimes you love, you learn... and you move on... and it's ok."

they forgot to mention how it doesn't hurt any less though. :'(

sigh... at least i know this is the last time i'll be crying this year.



to a new year, my friends.
stay strong.

December 24, 2009

.you've become my outlet once again.

sorry bout the hiatus.
you bet i'll be blogging again soon.
(i'm really just talkin to myself)

and just a quickie update:

the heart is still broken and yet to be mend.
would've been easier if it wasn't still in love... :(

merry xmas folks. stay tuned.