March 19, 2008

.leave me out of it please.

As I reminded Selina this morning,
I can be very selfish if I wanted to.

You see,
I can be a good friend when I wanna be.
However, one thing that always throws me off is when I get used as the "scape goat".

Here's the deal -

I'd love to listen to your problems if you don't call it "my fault".

I'd try my best to understand your actions if you're not gonna say "but sherlene said..." when shit hits the fan.

I'd try my best to be there for you if you can own up to the fact that you've brought the mess upon yourself, without any "sherlene was the one" or "sherlene was there" or "sherlene did that before"(s)...

Cuz that pisses me off.

And just to make things fair,
I believe if it really WAS my fault in some way that caused you to do whatever dumb thing you did,
I would make the connection and be apologetic.


But in saying that,
Don't f*ckin take advantage of that.
Cuz at the end of the day,
You have a mind of your own;
And you and I both know, despite you constantly denying it,
my only "true involvement" would be as a mere assurance that you've got someone to blame at the end of the day.

That's so low.

Look, I'll make you a deal.
How about...
I save my advices and hold my thoughts, if you leave me out of it?

ps:
I don't see why I need to change my ways becuz of you.
I don't see why I shouldn't do certain things in fear you would do the same.
I don't see why I need to hold my life back for your good.
I don't see why I should take the blame or feel guilty when you fail to use your brain.

... and don't say I didn't warn you, I can be selfish.
Don't push my limits.


***
How ironic.
Just re-reading this post,
I can already think of a few people who will take this post personally.
And I'm not about to say you're wrong.

No comments: