October 2, 2006

.mahfuz mat yaacob.

The guy who use to be Mine.

I've been thinking about Mahfuz alot lately.
I can't believe it's been 5 years since I last saw him.
He was my every heartbeat when I was 16...
The guy I call my First Love.

*warm and fuzzY*


























I suddenly felt the urge to find him...
To find out how he's doing and what he's up to.


I did a search of his name on Yahoo.
Found a webbie his classmate in Ipoh made up.
There was a class picture.
And yes,
There he was...
Standing there,
Looking goofy as always.

It made my heart sore.
I really do miss him.
And I really do look forward to the day when I get to see him again.
I wonder how that would be.

I always imagine it to be really sweet.
Both of us would take one look at each other,
and recall the wonderful times we shared,
and regretting all the dreams we never got to fulfil.


Then again,
I'm probably the only person who thinks of it that way.
I'm guessing that to him,
I'm just "one of the girls" he use to date.

But I guess that doesn't matter,
Cuz all I know is that...
Mahfuz left a permanent footprint in my heart.

And he'll always mean alot to me.

I just wish we had better closure.
So that everytime he comes to mind,
I dont have to always think of "What If"...

Maybe if we had better closure,
My heart would finally heal...
And It'll release me from all that pain,
And finally allow me to truly love again?

*YES. I AM A DRAMA QUEEN.*

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