.can no longer express myself.

its been a week since i last saw him.

but my feelings for him are still the same. :(

was at the gold coast with derek, ivan and wynna today. i could've seen him, but i didn't. although i wanted to, so much. hmm... for some reason, that thought makes me feel more upset than actually not seeing him.

i told ivan yesterday that im fine. that i dont feel the pain. instead, all just feels numb. it really does. i told him maybe its because my head has taken over my heart. ignored whatevers going on with the heart, and move on according to what the head says. logic & rationalism has prevailed.

do i feel sad? - i shouldn't. 

am i happy? - ... i dont feel that either. 

... but i do know that lately, any remotely sad movie can make me cry. my alternate emotion-outlet?

maybe its PMS. yea. that must be it.

p.s. my baby sheensie poo is back in brissie!! yay! more good says ahead! :)

p.s. :( i knew it could've been love...