October 15, 2008

.her story.


Letting Us Go
by lenniez



i took the window seat at the back of the bus and pulled out my mp3 player. the bus was filling up but the seat beside me remained vacant. i was plugging in one side of my earphones when i looked up and caught my breath. my mind went into a momentary blank as a familiar pair of eyes stared back at me.


we exchanged "heys" and he took the seat next to me. i found myself unable to speak, respond or think properly as his closeness was paralyzing. small talks were soon formed, but no reference was made of anything remotely close to the idea of me and him. i did not persist, unlike the old times, when flirting was all we knew.

he got me to agree to drive him home because i had parked my car at a closer stop. rain started pouring soon after, followed by a series of unforgiving thunder and lightning.

when we got off the bus, the rain was still heavily falling over us. we sought shelter under the bus stop and took deep breaths before looking at each other and deciding to make a run to the next covers. by the fourth and last run, we scrambled into my car, slammed the doors, and found ourselves drenched.

we both soaked up tissues and laughed about the idiocracy of the situation we were in. the car was fogging up and the air was damp. it reminded me of all the times we use to get drenched under the rain together, regardless of when we had an umbrella, which was perhaps too small for the both of us anyway. i took a short breath in. he was still as gorgeous as i remembered.
i gave him the keys to my car and he drove us back to his place. the rain was pouring mercilessly. his eyes were fixed on the road. i stole moments between lightning flashes and the rumbling thunder to gazed over at him. the knot in my heart twisted. i have wanted to see him so badly before tonight. and now that i had the chance, now that he was right beside me...; i sucked in another short breath, then used the last of my energy to look away.
i've found my kryptonite.


***
this is the place in my heart
this is the place where
im falling apart
isnt this just where we met?
and is this the last chance
that i'll ever get?
i wish i was lonely
instead of just only
crystal and see-through
and not enough to you

'cause you dont see me
and you dont need me
and you dont love me
the way i wish you would
the way i know you could


you dont see me - josie and the pussycats

3 comments:

jamez said...

Okay, i felt like crap after reading that post..

true story?

.lennie.sam.lee. said...

sadly.

Anonymous said...

*hugs*
u deserve whole load better ;)
and u will get better :D :D :D